Damage

[caption id="" align="alignright" width="240" caption="Accosted"][/caption]

Knowing when to stop talking is just as valuable as knowing when to talk about something. Some people do not understand this concept and continue talking to till the subject is so raw and bloody that they do not realize they have cause more harm than good. I am a strong proponent of "You cannot force someone to talk to you." In fact, I think i can safety take credit for coining that phrase.

Forcing someone to talk to you is  a lot like waterboarding; torture. If you constantly push someone and verbally accost them, they will eventually tell you anything and everything to get you to shut up and leave them alone. Sadly, this is a disservice to both parties. First, the accosted feels like a victim, and their credibility is now tarnished because they are essentially forced to lied to reclaim some sense of normalcy. Second, the person doing the accosting gets bad information, however it may be the information they wanted all along so it also leaves them with a false sense of justification which may lead them to believe that what they did was right. Well, it's not right.

There is a reason why most people believe that torture isn't worth the time and money. As previously stated, the chances of getting bad information are highly increased, and you also look like a jackass by forcing people to do what you want until they simply cannot take it anymore. Any information gathered through this process might as well be hearsay as the dependability is now always to be questioned. This also works against the accosted. Now, the torturer will become even more angry when they learn the information the accosted gave was false which leads them right back into the same method which gave them the bad information to begin with. After a time, more information will be gathered, most likely bad, and then they 2nd party will once again think they have succeed. It's a vicious cycle.

My Point?

Don't do it. It's like an accusing girlfriend prodding her boyfriend, and trying to get him to admit he is cheating when he isn't. He may begin to feel that if he is being accused of infidelity, he might as well go out and do it. I went through the same thing for years; being accused of this and that. After a period of time I didn't go out and cheat. I simply left and never looked back. If you want to drive someone away, by all means badger them with the same questions 5 or 6 different ways. You cannot make people talk to you so my advice is be more creative with your conversation. Be human. Think to yourself would you eventually freak out if someone kept poking you with a spoon for 7 years? Yes, it sounds funny, but eventually you will feel the urge to grab that spoon and gut them with it.